Why do grown-ups still have Picture Day?!

Today is a day I’ve been dreading since, well, since Sunday because that is when I found out about it, but I would have been dreading it way longer than that if I had known.  The church where I work is updating the website, and it includes new staff pictures of everyone.  If you read my quirky post, you know that having my picture taken is not okay with me.  I’ve been this way ever since I reached adulthood, and the image of myself that I have in my head became further and further from the truth.  It’s gotten worse and worse over the years, and now I probably need professional help.  Anyway, I began planning for today last night.  I decided what I would wear (which I don’t usually do), I went to bed early (beauty sleep – ha!) and I set my alarm for 30 minutes earlier than normal (to allow time for freak-outs). 

As I got ready this morning, I purposefully did not put on my make-up.  You see, Picture Day was happening in the afternoon, and I wanted my make-up to look “fresh.”  I packed my make-up, hairbrush and curling iron and headed off to work.  I was warned that for the photo session we would have to do a normal, smiling picture, and then a “funny” picture, too.  What is this, the spring break youth group trip?!  Or maybe the yearbook photo for Drama Club????!!!!  I can’t take this!  I don’t even have one good picture in me, and now you want me to be “funny”?!

When I returned to the office after lunch, others that had already been through the photo session were leaving.  They said you could use a prop or something for your “funny” picture.  Oh, good, can my prop be a huge fan or a sombrero pulled over my face?  That’s when the really bad news was delivered.  The pictures were not just regular head shots; they were full body shots!  Head to toe!!!  Horror of horrors!  I was in full panic mode.  What am I going to do?  Where can I hide?

I grabbed my puppet school mask off the shelf in my office to use as my prop for my “funny” picture, and very reluctantly went to the makeshift photo studio.  I stalled and stalled, waiting for every other person to go ahead of me.  I don’t know why; I knew it couldn’t be avoided.  I guess I was giving Jesus plenty of time in case he wanted to come back and take us all to heaven so I wouldn’t have to get my picture taken.  You may have guessed it, but the rapture didn’t happen.  I stood on the X and allowed a few pictures to be taken, with my mask and without.  I would like to tell you that when I saw the pictures, I had a revelation and decided that they were not that bad.  This is not what happened.  As soon as the first picture filled the computer screen, I grabbed my stuff and ran for the door.  It was terrible!  I’m telling you, when I see myself in the mirror every morning, I am at least 30 pounds lighter than I am in that picture!  My nose is smaller, my hair is thicker and healthier, my skin is clearer. . .how can a camera do so much damage?  I ended the day in tears, and then I decided that the only way to get it out of my system was to tell the blogosphere about it.  Dumb idea, I know, because now about 100 people are going to be anxiously awaiting the new Pointe North website and the Ugliest Picture they’ve ever seen.  Ugh!

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8 Responses to Why do grown-ups still have Picture Day?!

  1. chrissy says:

    Poor you. I don’t see why you would need full body shots unless you’re modeling for a catalog. I would freak out over that, too.
    I loved the last picture they had of you on the website. It was gorgeous. Why not keep it for ten years or so?

    I still have the silly Spring Break pictures if you can figure out a way to switch them. Let me know.

  2. chaotic joy says:

    Oh Becky. I am so sorry you had such an awful day. Trust me when I say I have had my share of pictures reduce me to tears. And the IDEA of a full body picture. I think I would throw up.

    I do wish I could make you see how beautiful you are. Hugs and prayers for you.

  3. sean rheaume says:

    I would never undermine someones quirks that cause so much anxiety but know that you are a beautiful woman (coming from a stub I must say) and you need to rebuke the enemy that whispers negativity into your spirit.

  4. michele says:

    i’m with ya there (hence my blog). but we did live. mine weren’t so good either. i’m much better in live action! and sean’s a suck up.

  5. brownam64 says:

    Sean is a STUB? Becky I think you are gorgeous and you shouldn’t let stupid pictures make you feel otherwise. By the way who’s idea was it for full body shots? My guess would be that it was not a woman who made this choice.

  6. Chastity says:

    Becky, I am sorry this has tortured you so! Poor thing! (insert cyber hug here) you are beautiful and like Sean said..”rebuke the enemy that whispers negativity into your spirit.” You have an inner beauty that seeps from everything you write…and on outer beauty that every else can see! You smile lights up your whole face and every Sunday when I pick up the kiddies…I look forward to seeing you and your beautiful smile!

    I once read somewhere online that Jealousy and insecurity cripple many of us. Trouble with these emotions as overwhelming as they are, are almost as hard to overcome as addiction to alcohol or drugs.

    I thought about you all day after I read this…and I keep on feeling God tell me to tell you this….He loves you and made you in HIs holy image…and as my Momma says, God don’t make no junk! I found this Bible verse and want to share it with you:
    Psalm 138:3 “3 When I called, you answered me;
    you made me bold and stouthearted.”
    I was not sure what stouthearted menat..so, I looked it up and it according to Merriam-Webster it means:having a stout heart or spirit: a: courageous: b: stubborn.

    God wants you to be courageous and bold and stubborn! I am SO glad you are here at Pointe North. You have made a tremendous diference in the lives of my children. I think you are beautiful and you need to “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” I Peter 5:7. I love you and my children love you !

  7. Heather Martin says:

    Becky I completely feel your pain, usually I am a complete ham and I don’t mind pictures taken of me if I’m being silly or goofy, and they are from the shoulders up. BODY SHOTS…UGH! In my mind I am super model thin, everything fits great, perfect skin, makeup, hair…then I see the pictures. Fat rolls on my neck?! WHAT! How is that possible? I look like a linebacker in that picture..what a terrible angle.

    Even though I am totally trained from elementary to tilt my head and lift my chin every time a camera is on me, if you throw my body in there I all of a sudden go from funny girl to America’s next beached whale!

  8. sean rheaume says:

    ok, I am not a stub but a stud…however honestly stub more aptly fits…but to defend my graphics team and my church we are doing a very creative thing with our new website to expose our ever expanding congregation to the real us, so rather than having the stuffy ol’ head shots we are doing casual normal and casual goofy shots of us. We DON’T HAVE PICTURE DAY.That is what we used to do…everyone would dress in their Sunday best and snap a head shot…that is not worthy of us. You know what…you are flawed. So am I and the rest of us (EVEN CAL). Let us reveal our greatness and our flaws to a church that follows our leadership.
    Love ya,

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