Dear Faithful Readers, November 3, 2009

I’ve been doing some thinking about this tired ol’ blog, and I have an idea.  Actually, I have a few ideas.  I just have to be committed to taking the time to flesh them out.  Ew, flesh is sort of a gross word.  That’s not part of the idea.  Moving on.

Creatively speaking, I find that I’m much better at being creative when I’m limited in some way.  It’s ironic, if you think about it.  When I sit down to write, and I don’t have anything in mind, I get stuck.  A few weeks ago, I thought about an idea for a post that would be in the form of a letter.  Then I thought, “What if all my posts are letters?”  And then I started having one idea after another.  So I’m going to do it.  Starting with this post, all posts will be letters to someone or something.

Think about it…right now I’m writing a letter to anyone that hasn’t given up on this little blog.  Maybe I’ll write letters to God, myself, stuff I like, stuff I hate, real things, imaginary things, you never know.  Maybe it will last, maybe it won’t, but I like the idea.

I’m also going to change the look and the name to fit the theme, so don’t be alarmed.  It’s still me.

 

Free Truck September 20, 2009

Is anybody still out there?  I said…..IS ANYBODY OUT THERE?!  Okay, now that we’re all awake again, I’m here to say (type) that I think I’m back.  Every once in a while I would think of something to post, but I just wouldn’t take the time.  Lately I’ve been feeling creative, and I think the old blog is going to be revamped soon.  However, I wanted to go ahead and get this story in here since it’s so good.  Here we go!

Let’s just skip to the punchline, shall we?

Yes, this is my truck.  And now I will tell you how it happened.

Little did I know when I wrote my post about starting over that I was not all the way at zero yet.  Oh, no.  In April, my car died on the way to Charleston, and I was forced to move back in with my parents so I could use their vehicles to get to work.  Yeah, I was 33 years old and living with my parents.  Not cool.  I immediately began praying for a miracle.  I knew that if God wanted me to have a vehicle, He would provide.

One day I was talking to my friend Ariana on the phone, and I was whining and complaining expressing my frustrations.  I saw cars parked in people’s garages, parked in the lot at my storage facility, cars everywhere.  People just have extra cars.  Why can’t I just use one for a while?

Well, apparently, she heard me.  And so did God.  At the end of June, Ariana left me a message.  She said some friends of hers happened to mention to her that they had a truck that they wanted to give away.  She told them she knew someone that might want it.  That someone was me.  And I did.  With a little bit of arranging, we made the plans and I flew to Charleston to get my free truck.

This is where the story gets funny.

You see, the only time for me to pick up the truck was after the owner got home from work on a Tuesday.  I had to be at work at 4:30am on Wednesday.  It’s completely doable, I thought.  As soon as I get the truck, I’ll drive straight back to Georgia, get some sleep, and go to work.  No problem.  My friend Marci drove me to the owner’s house, but we beat him there.  I saw the truck parked out front, so of course I looked in the window to take a peek.

Uh, oh.  Trouble in paradise.  This is a stick shift.  I did not know how to drive this free vehicle.  Oh, how God lauged at me at that moment.  This is why we must be specific in our prayers.

Thankfully, Marci knew how to drive it.  I drove her car back to her side of town, and she started teaching me how to drive the truck.  Two hours of bucking, stalling, stressing, swearing, laughing and crying later, I was a frazzled mess.  I decided that I would have to skip work the next day and just leave in the morning.

Through this process, I couldn’t help but notice the lessons.  I feel like God is literally taking me back to a time when I was very close to Him.  I am starting over, and God is restoring the lost years just as He promised.

Now I’m almost good at driving my new truck.  I’m so thankful that Ariana and Marci are my friends.  I’m very thankful that God provided a vehicle so that I would have some freedom.  And nothing makes you feel young again like learning how to drive.

If you’re looking for something happy… April 15, 2009

…you’ve come to the wrong dang blog.  Apparently things can always get worse.

I had a very productive Monday and Tuesday planned.  I had to go to Charleston to complete the last few elements of the vast amount of rigmarole it takes to work on a cruise ship.  In addition to this, I had planned a trip to the doctor and the pharmacy since my incredibly expensive health insurance is only good in South Carolina.  Leave work Monday morning, drive to Charleston, see the doctor, have dinner with friends, sleep, apply for a TWIC card, apply for Merchant Mariner’s Document, stop by the pharmacy, drive back to Atlanta.  Piece of cake.

That is if my car didn’t blow up.  And if I didn’t miss my doctor’s appointment because of it.  And if the Coast Guard had been clear about exactly what paperwork I would need to bring with me.  And if my refills at the pharmacy hadn’t expired.

So bad things happen sometimes.  Trust me, if anyone knows this, it’s me.  However, at this point, I have bypassed disappointment and worry and sadness.  Now I’m scared.  Through all the crazy things I’ve been through – all my moves, all my jobs – I’ve always had a car and health insurance.  The fact that I can’t think of a single way that I will be able to get either one of these things is very scary to me.  I feel like nothing is safe.  What am I going to lose next?

Seeing green March 17, 2009

Today is St. Patrick’s Day.  Just like last year, this post is work-related.  Today I did my cashier training at Target.  Therefore I was forced to wear the color that is the opposite of the preferred color of the day.  Good thing my eyes are green or I would have been pinched.

Anyway, as I was working the register, I began to suffer from a form of reverse buyer’s remorse.  I guess that’s seller’s remorse?  It’s hard to believe that there is a problem with the economy when you’ve just watched people spending large amounts of money on junk for 5 1/2 hours.  Perhaps my current situation is also playing a part.  I mean, I’ve been trying my best to spend nothing lately, so it’s hard to watch someone spend $200 on towels.  Nothing else, just towels.  Her family must be really dirty.  I wanted to start asking people to really consider their needs.  “Ma’am, do you really need this pink lampshade?”  Then I remembered that my paycheck is directly influenced by the ridiculous and irresponsible purchases of the general public, and I felt a lot better about it.

Happy St. Purchase, I mean, Patrick’sDay!

Starting Over March 13, 2009

When I was poking around online a few months ago, I found a plan for reading the Bible in one year in chronological order, in the order the events happened.  I thought this was interesting, and yesterday I started doing it.  Genesis is still at the beginning, by the way.

When I read the part about the flood, I had the same thought I usually do when I read it.  Why did God even create the world the way He did when He knew He was going to just wipe it all out and start over?

On an unrelated subject, I’ve been focusing a lot lately on my financial situation.  I’ve actually been thinking about it since October.  I really want to get to the point where I am debt-free, but it just seems impossible.  At this point, I’m living for free, my car is paid for, so I’m not sure how to cut back much more.  I came to the conclusion that I need to sell everything that I can because I can’t afford to keep all my stuff in storage.

I woke up this morning thinking about my furniture.  I really like my furniture.  I’ve just collected it over the years from craigslist and other things.  I always found good deals on stuff.  Everything is so comfortable, and I just hate the thought of getting rid of it.

That’s when God said to me, “I know it’s not what you want to do, but sometimes you just have to get rid of almost everything and start over.”

Gettin’ stuff dun in the country March 10, 2009

Looking for a job is one of my least favorite activities, but for some reason I find myself doing it every year or so.   I’m usually not too bad at it.  This time I seem to be welcoming a few additional challenges that have previously never been included in my job searches.

1.  The economy is bad.  There are a lot more people looking for jobs, and the hiring parties can afford to be a lot choosier and a lot lazier.  Most applications are online, no phone number or address included.  This is not great for me because I am much better in person – not so great in type.

2.  My heart is just not into it.  I usually leave a job under my own choice, and I am usually already working at the job that will replace it.  It’s hard to have the “go out and get ‘em” attitude that is necessary during a job search when all you want to do is find the rug that was just under you.

3.  I keep finding jobs that have an unheard of amount of paperwork and preliminary requirements.  This is what brings me to the title of this post.  You see, I have a conditional agreement to work as a youth counselor for Norwegian Cruise Lines in Hawaii in the fall.  It is conditional because I have to provide a lot of information and receive a lot of certifications before I can actually work.  The last thing on my list of things to fax in to my future employers was a copy of my criminal record from my current county of residence.  Today I looked up the location of the county buildings that I thought would be appropriate and set out to collect a copy of my blank criminal record.

At this point in the story, I need to let you know that I live in a tiny town, and I did not grow up here.

Of course the first building I tried was not the building that I needed to go to.  I was at the county administration building, but I needed to be at the sheriff’s office.  A kind, well-meaning woman tried to give me directions to the sheriff’s office.  After we established all the things that I don’t know about (“Do you know where _____ is?  No. Well, then do you know where ____ is? No.), she attempted to explain the route without using any road names at all.  I kid you not, these were the two, the only two, landmarks I had to go on:

“Bay-er leyft at the cheeeli dawg playce in the meedle of the roahdah.”

“Turn raight at the laighthayouse chuurch.”

“Theeyn just falla the saigns that say ‘Shayriff’s Ahhffice.”

The sign on the wooden archway is the only sign that lets you know this is the sheriff’s office, and it was almost impossible to read.  The paint was flaking off of everything.  There were prisoners standing around outside.  I was scared!  I said a prayer as I walked into the building.  Fortunately, I walked into the right door and was not escorted into a cell.  I received my non-existent criminal record and high-tailed it out of there!  (Not without snapping a quick picture from inside my car.)

The moral of the story: if you need to get any official stuff done in the country, bring a friend or let someone know where you’re going.

Is anyone still out there? March 6, 2009

I’ve been gone for quite awhile.  I’m not really sure what to say about it.  I’ve thought about this post a lot.  How can I even begin to write about the last 2 1/2 months?  I decided that I just need to do it.  I need to just write and get it out.  I’m hoping that I might be able to help someone else with my words.  More than that, I’m hoping that someone else’s words will help me.

I lost my job.  My church job.  Honestly, my emotions are still quite raw, and I’m not sure when they will heal.  At first there were so many questions.  I couldn’t understand any of it.  Now it seems like there are too many answers.  I’m always analyzing and coming up with a new reason why it happened.

This is easily the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through.  I didn’t just lose my job; I lost my support system.  I feel like I’m going through a divorce, and Pointe North is my ex.  My ex’s family may tell me that they still love me and are praying for me, but I know that they are not really a part of my life anymore.  It hurts when I hear that my ex has moved on and is doing well.  I can’t be in the same room.  I had to move out and run back to my parents.  See what I mean?

Well, here it is.  My first post-divorce post.  I’m hoping this will be a step toward normalcy.  Hopefully I will be back to my regular, hilarious-story-telling self again soon.

Stop the presses November 12, 2008

Sometimes brilliant ideas just don’t come to pass.

When I was researching and brainstorming for things to do at KidsPointe for the two Sundays prior to Thanksgiving, I had what I thought was a brilliant idea.  I wanted to have a KidsPointe Thanksgiving Parade.  You know, like Macy’s, only a little smaller.  Each class was going to have it’s own theme with a float and costumes.  There would be pilgrims in the Mayflower, Indians around a teepee, scarecrows in a cornfield, football players, cheerleaders, turkeys, pumpkins and a kazoo marching band.  We were even going to have knights and princesses as a teaser for the next series starting in January.  All the floats were going to be made of paper mache, and I had already placed an all call for newspaper all over Moncks Corner.  Sounds like a lot of work, doesn’t it?

Yeah, that’s why we’re not doing it.

I just didn’t get going on it in time.  I’m disappointed in myself for not following through on a good idea.  However, I know it would have taken a lot of energy for not much return.  There’s so much more that I need to work on that has to do with actually teaching kids about Jesus.  I know, how ’bout you guys just imagine what it would have looked like, and then we’ll just pretend it actually happened.  That’s a lot less work.

Miracle Sunday October 28, 2008

This past Sunday was Miracle Sunday at our church.  We were challenged to pray about and prepare to give a miracle offering over and above our regular tithe.  We were also challenged to come forward and take a stand to make changes in our lives whether it be about money or healing or whatever.  I’ve been feeling convicted about how I spend my money for a while now, even before I heard the message that delivered this challenge.  When Cal talked to us about giving a miracle offering, I looked at my checkbook.  For the last few months, for no particular reason that I can see, all the bills have been paid late, and I have used the dreaded credit cards when the balance got too low.  How would I have anything to give?  All I could think to do was cut up my credit cards and give those.  I felt so guilty.  God deserves an amazing gift, and I’m going to give him my credit card debt?  I prayed for an answer and felt very confused.  Should I write a check for money I know I don’t have so that God provide the miracle?  How can I expect a miracle if I never take a risk?  In 2 Kings 4, the widow had to collect the jars first before the oil started flowing.  But then again, it didn’t really feel right to give a rubber check to God.  On Sunday morning, I still wasn’t sure.  I decided that I would give the credit cards, but I didn’t know if that was enough.  I ripped open my checkbook and quickly scribbled out a check for $50.  As I stood in the line leading to the front, I was so ashamed of my offering.  An envelope full of cut up plastic and $50 courtesy of overdraft protection.  As I prayed I felt God lifting my own disappointment off of me.  I didn’t even know the weight of all that debt until I felt the freedom of giving it all to God.  Now I just pray that the miracle of becoming debt-free will come quickly.  I’ve tried on my own many times, but it always feels too insurmountable and I give up.  This time I’m praying for a miracle.

If you would like to share the miracle you are praying for, please do.  Maybe God’s already done it, and that would be great to hear about, too.

Some thoughts on autumn October 21, 2008

• It’s kind of weird that we have two names for this season – fall and autumn
• I like pumpkin bread/muffins
• I wore my first new sweater of the season today
• It’s funny that lots of people feel very strongly about fall.  They really love it.  I think it’s funny because it’s not like we get a choice.
• I am indifferent towards fall.  I like the leaves, I like bonfires and hayrides and fall activities, but I know that winter comes after fall and I don’t like winter.  (That is a run-on sentence.)
• Seeing the fall colors was one of the few things I liked about living in Connecticut.  If you like the leaves here, you should really go to New England in September.
• Now I can turn on the space heater in my office without ridicule.
• It’s a good thing that I don’t scare too easily because the large oak tree in the yard drops acorns all over the house.  I could really psych myself out and start to wonder if someone is throwing things at my house or if someone is trying to break in.  But it’s just acorns.
• I made a fall wreath last year out of fall-colored fabric, rafia and fake berries.  It’s a very easy craft, very cheap and good to do with kids.  I can show you how if you want to know.  You could make it for any season.
• I am 3/4 of the way through my Pumpkin candle.  Up next: Mulled Cider.  Up next after that: Maple Pecan.  However I have already started burning my Christmas Wreath candle at work.  I’m mixing it up a bit.

That’s enough.  Anything you would like to share?